日本："Housewife" Adventures Ep. 1

As you may know, while I'm here, I'm honing my housewife skills (along with other things, such as literary knowledge and Japanese). Not in an attempt to be all anti-feminism and such (because I think this should go for the guys as well as the dolls), but whatever happened to learning how to be a good spouse/parent/just being able to take care of yourself? Remember those days when ladies used to learn drawing, music, needlework and languages...oh wait, no, that was the victorian era. My bad. I mean when we used to learn how to cook and take care of the laundry and things of that nature. Now, don't get me wrong, I think everyone should go live their life like an adventure and aim for whatever their goal may be -- an amazing career, world traveler, lord of all time and space, whatever your thing is. However, let's be honest -- everyone should learn how to cook and do simple house chores. Those kinds of things should be common knowledge. It's not like we have housekeepers, ladies' maids, and cooks these days...at least I don't.

Here's to honing some skills in case someone is unlucky enough to be stuck with us for a long time. Ho ho, how I pity you and your wretched fate.

First things first, I had to buy some house slippers to really get the gears turning.

Tiny polka dots AND strawberries!? Isn't that the definition of cute or something?

Slippers -- Check. Next step, a fully stocked fridge as a result of scrambling around a grocery store and using your phone translator to make sure you grab the tofu, not the natto. (Actually, I've never had natto. Everyone says I wouldn't like it, so I've never had the opportunity to attempt it. I mean they're probably right, but you should always try things once, right? I've even tried balut. But in fairness, it was overdone.) Our fridge is filled with...

20 bottles of ピルクル! (Probiotic dairy product -- Yakult but different brand)

Was my first time having it -- delicious!

Ok, there are a bunch of other items in there, but they aren't very interesting. Except the on-sale roll cake (why are the Japanese so good at making sponge cake, like air I tell you! AIR!), some calpico, and my favorite...KIRI!  We've been reunited my preferred cream cheese option!

Philadelphia can stay in Pennsylvania!

Now all we need is a trusty cleaning buddy! Meet Walter. He loves pina coladas and dancing in the rain, and is always smiling, even when he is face down, scrubbing the dirt from the tub. (Actually he always has one face up...Two-faced, y'all. Watch out for the Walts. )

Something sinister lurks in those eyes...

 

That's all for this episode of "Housewife Adventures." Join us next time for..

What was for dinner, Devoni?

Sure to be an enthralling episode.